August 2023

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I woke up this morning thinking about my self care activity in self love and how important it is. Then, the first post I saw this morning was a perspective on self love!

We have been taught that self love is selfish or egotistical. Yet, how are we to love our neighbor as ourself if we do not know how to love and appreciate ourself?

So, although the activity was difficult for me, I guess it was important and I have found it rewarding to have found so many things that I do love about myself! I did finish the activity days ago, but haven't taken the time to post the rest of the list. Here we go!

Things I Love About Myself Day 6 & 7

I enjoy that my eyes change colors (depending on my mood or what I wear)
I have beautiful hair (in every shade I try)
I strive to improve my physical strength & flexibility
I'm committed to feeling and living my best.
I am grateful for this journey of getting older and wiser
I listen to my body and am willing to adapt to it's changes and needs
I smile readily
I enjoy gazing at the few stars I can see
I cherish my eyesight
I have a heightened sense of smell (I can often smell things long before other people can it is not always appreciated by others lol)
I am awed by nature
Horses soothe my soul
I am good at working with horses
I take good care of the animals that come into my life
I strive to be a good steward of the earth
I have been told that I have a melodious voice
I enjoy having the best parents
I believe every moment (good and bad) is a gift
I believe every moment of this life prepares us for eternity
I live an abundant life

I saw the trailer for Ahsoka and asked Bob: when are we watching that? His reply was that it didn't really look interesting. I looked at him and said: But.... but.... but, it's Star Wars! Guess what we watched... ;)

OK, so not the most mesmerizing, but I enjoyed it. :)

My lab results are in...

Hemoglobin: good
TSH: good
Glucose: hey, you better watch it! (as expected)

So, I'm in good health and just transitioning from perimenopause to menopause. This is what I thought, but it is nice to have that verified. :)

I think I've gotten the dizziness mostly under control (as long as I take my supplements). Since this stage can last 5-14 years (oh boy!), I hope to figure out how to handle the extended days of misery sooner than later. I do think I am on the right track though as this past cycle was manageable despite it all and my horse, Destiny, didn't try to avoid being around me as he has been. ;)

My oldest and Dad needed a little help, so I spent a little over a week up in their area. The plan was to stay two weeks, but couldn't quite stay away from Bob for that long. I wasn't alone in missing my partner... he said: if you don't have to stay the entire time, please come home... the TV dinner he bought actually tasted good for the first time in several years! It was too hot to do much of anything outside any way, so I told them I'll be back in September. :)

Even before I left I was having trouble keeping up with the weeds...

Baby barn swallows :)

I was cleaning a barn yesterday. On the third wheelbarrow, some of the very dry manure went into my boot when I dumped it. I looked down at my boot and said to myself. Ok, I must be done for the day and left to take a shower.

Things I Love About Myself Day 5

I do not allow my limitations to rule my life
I am willing to try new things (sparingly, but it is there ;) )
I am goals oriented
I have a forward focused mindset
I take steps towards achieving my goals and dreams.
I am tenacious of my dreams
I try to learn from history (my own, others & world)
I also try not to get stuck & dwell in the past
I am competent
I may need a break after a failure, but I get back up and try again

I got a little side tracked yesterday and didn't post my list, so I'm doubling up today :)

Day 3

I treat kids like humans (not as dolls to be seen and not heard)
I can give the grandkids undivided attention (even if it is short)
I can give adults undivided attention too
I can admit when I don't know something
I can admit when I was wrong about something
I try to see things from other perspectives
I am willing to learn
I am willing to share what I learn
I am inquisitive
I homeschooled both of my kids (and they are smarter than me now)

Day 4

I am persistent
I strive to see the silver lining
I strive to not allow my emotions to control my actions
I appreciate and respect all living things (except mosquitoes & ticks ;) )
I expect respect from others if they want to be in my life
I have firm boundaries
I can compromise
But, I do not compromise my values
I accept that not everyone will agree with my opinions and that is ok
I appreciate clear communication

Wow. I can really relate to much of this song. Glad to be "on the other side" :)

Things I Love About Myself Day 2

I am committed to a relationship with my loving Creator
I am caring
I am sensitive
I am understanding
I do not consider myself an artist, but I am creative
I am committed to personal improvement and growth
I support others in their own journey
I strive to be authentic
I am not afraid to be honest with myself and others
I am resilient

Thank you all for the feedback! <3

This is the "theme song" for my new course. I like it. :) Mostly, I like the lyrics...

When you look at the universe
what do you see?
Everything always in motion
The galaxies spinning somewhere the wind blows
and there's always a wave on the ocean
Using this logic it's fair to conclude
to move is the nature of life.
So instead of fighting to stand in one place,
I'd rather get on and ride.
Onward, upward and forward!
To chart a new course for my life.
I'm tired of waiting, I came here to live
instead of merely to survive.
Onward, upward and forward!
to an upgraded version of me.
Instead of my fears, I will follow my dreams
because I'd rather go where they lead
Onward, upward and forward!
Onward, upward yeah
Some people think only what is or what was
is all our next chapter can be
but I'd rather dream of what could be instead
and create a new legacy.
New places to go and new questions to ask
like, what more can I become?
With heart and mind open, I'm making the most
of my next trip around the sun!
Onward, upward and forward!
To the answers I'm ready to find.
If I'm to become more than I've ever been
It's time to stop looking behind.
Onward, upward and forward!
To know what it's like to be free!
Instead of my fears I will follow my dreams because I'd rather go where they lead.
Onward, upward and forward!
Onward, upward and forward!
This is the direction of life
I honor what's been and I breathe here and now
but forward is where I will find
MORE
Onward, upward and forward!
To chart a new course for my life.
I'm tired of waiting, I came here to live
Instead of just merely survive.
Onward, upward and forward!
To an upgraded version of me
Instead of my fears I will follow my dreams
bcause I'd rather go where they lead
Onward, upward and forward!
To the answers I'm ready to find.
If I'm to become more than I've ever been
it's time to stop looking behind.
Onward, upward and forward!
To know what's it's like to be free
Instead of my fears
I will follow my dreams
because I'd rather go
where they lead!
Onward!
Upward!
Forward!
Right now
Onward, upward and forward!

I have started my self care list assignment of listing things I love about myself. I thought I should view myself as I would view someone else and start listing what I like about what I would see.

Day 1

1. I am a loving mother
2. I am a loving grandmother
3. I am a loving wife
4. I am a loving daughter
5. I enjoy helping my family
6. I am good at organization
7. I am good at cleaning
8. I am a decent cook
9. I am a decent seamstress
10. I am not afraid of hard work (not dirty though... I really don't like getting dirty...

My youngest came up with a quick solution to my self-care assignment. He asked: How many bones do you have?

The point being, of course, that I have at least 206 things to like about myself... ;)

I did it! *giggle* Most of the courses for this set was a review (which is why I chose to do it ;) ), but I did learn more about mindfulness and fitness tests that have provided me goals to strive for. :)

I am excited about the next set of courses that I've chosen to do. I found out this morning that the instructor is a martial artist self defense teacher. The set of courses is shorter than the previous three have been, but it looks like a lot for me to process. The set of courses includes: self care, focus, confidence and empowerment.

I thought the self care one would be super easy, but I find myself already challenged. The assignment is to think of 10 things that you like about yourself every day for a week. ummm...

I saw these blooms one day last week, but when I went to take their picture the next morning they were gone. I was confused and disappointed. When I looked out the window this morning and saw more blooms I went out right away for pictures! :) I have learned that a common name for them is Flower of an Hour, which explains why the blooms disappeared so quickly. ;)

This is one of a few balance tests that I was introduced to in my wellness course today: The Standing Stork Test

I have been working on my balance and can now hold a flat-footed stork pose without holding on to a chair or wall for 45 seconds. But, add standing on the ball of the foot? almost 2 seconds. :p Guess what I will be working on? ;)

On a side note, I do find it interesting that the chart shows men, in general, having better balance than women.

It seems that the Lord has provided us with a tractor!

Sadly, circumstances have required my son-in-law to downsize his projects. He knew of our interest in obtaining a tractor and lack of funds in doing so. So, he is "paying forward" by allowing us to pay him as we are able and was able to borrow the truck and trailer needed to deliver it. <3

The tractor needs a little work, but Bob is really good at mechanical stuff and is certain that he'll be able to do what needs done before winter sets in. And here I thought we would have to go another winter without a tractor!

Bob has been waiting all afternoon for the rain to stop in order to work on the car. Then, he has this brilliant idea... he says: hey, we have a garage I can pull the car into... We so love it here!

Bob was able to fly a Cessna 310 (with an instructor) yesterday. This is a bigger plane than he has flown before. It has two engines instead of one and a lot more instruments, controls and procedures to keep track of! He was up at 9000 feet, flying in and around the clouds. He says that, yes, the one picture shows that the propeller is not moving. This was a normal training procedure and nothing to be concerned about.

This flight provided him with the experience to finish setting up the simulator to begin training. The first student is scheduled to start on Monday. They will be adding a few optional switches at a later date, but it is nice to have the main part of this process done.

Hurray!

I was anxious when I applied for this certificate. There were two pages that listed requirements and they had conflicting information. I had completed all of the courses on one page, but not from the other. So, I wasn't certain if I had qualified or not! It was decided that I had and I am glad about that! :)

This art project from the course I'm taking is called "When I was 17". It is supposed to be a visual representation of the gifts, talents, desires, and things important to you that you had around that time of your life. D. Gary Young encouraged this connection as well and referred to it as Connecting with Your Inner Child. Although I've recently done the reflection on it, and have spent a bit of time purposefully reconnecting with her the past two years, I've never done a visual representation on it before. I'm including 15-20 years old as I think I was pretty consistent during that time.

- My life desire was to do something with horses! (of course)
- My personal connection with God has always been important to me.
- Mom used to tell me that I was good at teaching - even if I didn't love it.
- I really enjoyed learning and dancing.
- I was quite empathic and spiritually intuitive.

I don't have very many connections from that time in my life that knew me well, but I am tagging a few people to see if I've forgotten any thing.
Am I missing anything?

I was commenting on how slow my toe is healing (it has been two weeks... I know it can be two more) and Bob says: Welcome to 50.

The course I am currently taking includes art projects. I don't necessarily fully embrace the world of spirit animals, but I thought with my love of animals that this project would be fun. First, I decided to use digital art for my chakra totems with spirit animal representations. As someone who loves fantasy, I decided to also do one that included some mystical creatures. Horses are considered my power animal. I don't know that I will actually use any of this information but a fun project for self-reflection and self-expression. :)

I turned 50 today. 50! I woke up from a dream of doing handstands and cartwheels.... maybe when I'm 60...

But, I did decide that I wanted to do something fun, so I asked my youngest to take me to Those Blasted Things (it is nearby). I wanted a collection of calcite, but kept getting distracted and only chose a deep red one. Instead of the other calcite colors (I still want blue, green, pink, zebra, coffee and yellow), I decided on angelite and shiva lingum. Together the have an intense energy! While I was waiting for my treasures to be rung up at the register, I felt a soft "call". I looked over and saw this lovely yellow opal bracelet. The cashier (owner?) patiently waited while I held it for a moment before deciding to add it to my purchase. :)

We then met up with Bob at a Chinese restaurant that I've never been to for lunch. My youngest and I browsed in a new store and stopped in at Walmart to pick up a few items. While there, we were stopped by an acquaintance of my youngest. So, I had a short conversation with a new person too. Talk about an adventurous day (for me)!

Moonrise Crystals website says of yellow opal: "Yellow Opal asks us to pop our comfort bubbles and instead embrace all the different colorful sides of life."

I certainly felt calm and open to moving outside my comfort bubbles while I was wearing it. :) I do feel a little over-stimulated and happy to be home now though. ;)